Craigslist: everything you heard is true
Actual interaction I had with some craigslist lame-o who emailed me and called and was two hours late getting back to me about picking up two six-foot floor lamps:
“Do they disassemble?”
“Yeah, they unscrew into like three pieces, so they’re easy to move.”
“Would they fit in a backpack?”
“…They’re SIX FEET TALL. EACH. …No, they will not fit in a BACKPACK.”
I had to email someone else, who showed up in like 10 minutes with a pick-up truck, so they’re not ALL freaks. And they certainly aren’t all freaks like this:
Missed Connections: Pedestrian hit by car this morning
I was in the car behind the red SUV that hit you this morning. I didn’t see much of what happened, but I know we had a red light. You looked like you weren’t hurt too badly - maybe a bit dazed, but walking around, so I didn’t stop. Kind of wish I had, just to be sure. Feel free to email back if you want, just to let me know you’re ok.
Oh, craigslist. You guys are freaks.
And apparently some of you are prostitutes. Yeah, who saw that coming.
I am getting sort of settled into my new apartment. I have furniture, and I’ve started hanging pictures and putting up posters and shit. Soon I should even have a bed frame. Oh, the luxury.
The important thing is that I hung the Scary Child:*
I thought long and hard, and that was definitely the scariest place to hang it. Home sweet home.
—
*The Scary Child is a piece of art–we’re not totally sure WHAT the medium is–created by my cousin and given to his brother, another cousin, who promptly gave it to my mother when she saw it in his house and remarked that it really reminded her of me. This is the fourth apartment that it has graced with its terrible presence. Matt really hates it.
September 6th, 2007 at 9:06 am
Poltergeist’s vision of the child inside the television comes to mind
with a very dark portal.
Reminding me of the “All is Vanity” illustration
my Father reproduced frequently to callibrate his darkroom enlarger.
http://www.sandlotscience.com/Ambiguous/All_is_Vanity1.htm
September 6th, 2007 at 9:26 am
Nice placement of the SC. Somehow, it gives the impression that it’s an old family portrait. When looked at that way, it’s even scarier.
September 6th, 2007 at 9:31 am
I am sending you my therapy bills. :p
September 6th, 2007 at 4:59 pm
The Scary Child really reminds me of something, but I’m blowed if I know what.
September 6th, 2007 at 8:27 pm
jesus effing christ. I wouldn’t be able to sleep with that thing in my home. It looks like something straight out of a Japanese horror film. Scary child indeed!
September 8th, 2007 at 9:17 pm
So two years ago, a couple of us GC folks wrote a couple of essays outlining an edited volume of research on CL. My friend Angelique was going to do the social construction of the “good pet owner” on the pets forum. I was curious about the discrepancies between pictures and descriptions on M4M ads, particularly regarding male anatomy that is or is not, um, altered, and that even as a big ole dyke I could tell men didn’t necessarily know the difference. Kim was going to write about the roomate finding process via CL. We had a couple of other research topic ideas. But just as our mock sociology conference fell to the side (it was titled Sociomedy, and it was very funny), so did this project… So feel free to plagiarize…
September 12th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
how can you sleep at night with that thing only feet away? good lord. it reminds me of those absolutely terrifying illustrations from “scary stories to tell in the dark.” less drippy, though. much less drippy.